11.15.2006

i'm way more judgemental than i want to believe

it's funny how timing works. after my previous post, i definitely felt good about myself. the common ground i found with theresa in her deconversion experience was evidence of a change that god's been working in me over the past few months - teaching me to default to what we can agree on instead of where we differ. (a.k.a. where i'm right and you're wrong) i was so proud of this progress made that i guess i needed to be reminded that i don't have it figured out. i would love to tell the story, but it's too long and i don't have the patience. in a nutshell, i went to lunch with someone who believes differently than me on many issues that are important to me (he's also a christian by the way) and instead of looking for the common ground i could share with him, i ranted and raved for 30 minutes after the lunch was over about how i couldn't believe this guy was for real!

suffice it to say, i was reminded harshly of my inner desire to be judge and jury based on the way i felt about this guy. i also realized that i'm the same as him - i have opinions that i can't believe someone else doesn't share, and since he didn't share my opinions/values, there must be something wrong with him.

i had to spend some time asking god to forgive my horrible attitude toward his son and continue the refinement process in me.

whoa doggy, i have a long, long, long way to go.

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